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Wednesday, April 9, 2014

What evil lives with in humans?

How long does it take for a dogs hair to matte to the point of amputation? I am sickened and saddened to to think how long this dog was neglected then dumped like trash.
In rescue you see and hear about so much horrendous inhumane treatment that is inflicted by humans on the animals of this earth. We the humans where put in charge of all of God creachers to take care of them. We have failed on every level of this task. Humane ,adjective definition, marked by compassion, sympathy, or consideration for humans or animals. How does one grow up and live in this society and be completely void of humanity? Does ones family pass this lack of humanity down to their off springs or do they just wake up one day and become monsters. I am not a psychiatrist nor do I ever want to be. To look in the face of people like this would keep me awake for ever. I can not begin to understand, this goes beyond ignorance this pure evil. I want to be mad as hell and punch my pillow and cuss to top of my voice, but I am just sickened to the point of tears. I can not even find peace in blogging as all I can think of is day after day someone walked by this dog and did nothing to ease its pain. Then after the skin was pulled away by the knotting matting fur they took him to a shelter in the dark of night to dump him. As this was more humane than dumping him along the side of the road. Did this ease there conscience and make them feel better about what they did? 
I can not find my strength to deal with this. I pray I will find it soon as this one is taking a big hunk of me.  May we all look into our hearts to find peace for this world is not getting better.

Friday, October 11, 2013

Surviving the blues.

I have no way to know the early beginnings of the dogs I help. By the time I am involved there is so much life that has passed that only the dog can know what he has lived. The information that is passed along with the dog as it moved from one place to another, is often just a tiny little bit of truth. As dogs live in the moment they do not have the ability to dwell on the how’s, why’s or what for. Most folks just want to make themselves feel better about abandoning their dog. Other just don’t care and know that many rescues will not help them line their pockets by taking the left over breeding stock they have no use for. Yes there are a very small percentage of people that are not this way.  In rescue I never meet these people.

The decisions that rescues often must make are not always the one we want to make.  We want to save them all, but this is not a possibility in real life.  As we are a non-profit and funds are often just not there to help dogs.  I personally and many of my fellow rescuers have given up many thing in our own privet lives to save a dog. We put so much of our personal finances into what we do that we never have left over for ourselves. But we do it because of our love for dogs.   But the mental toll can be exhausting.  I never want to say when it is time for a life to stop. Directly or indirectly, just not having money to help a dog can be the end for the dog. To say we are full and have no open homes can be the determining factor that can end a life. Many rescues and shelters work together to help the dogs but there is a limit to all we are able to do. We share e-mail request for help to other rescue when we cannot help, we use the social media to get the word out that there is more dogs than humanly possible of helping.  Making the “no” room at the inn, a daily response. Adding to the emotional stress of knowing that on an extremely regular basis we are making the decision that may end a life.

Some want to help but have no idea the drain it can have and do not last long making this a very fluid, ever changing environment. Then if you add the folks who have their own personal agenda to why they want to be involved in rescue, can make it more difficult to help animal and keep ones sanity.  There are no books no schools that we go to and learn this. The folks that volunteer are just caring dog lovers. As the breeding show dog world call us, pet people. There is a whole area of prejudice that runs amuck through the dog world.  Dog behavior is an interpretation of what humans think is happening. Dogs cannot talk and even if they could I am not sure we would still know how to help. We mostly cannot help the human population and we can communicate. So we all have different views and beliefs of what is best. I try hard to stay in the middle of the dog world but am not successful.  Yes I have my own beliefs and try not to think mine is the correct one, it much easier to say than do. The complexity of humans and their personal beliefs likes and dislikes can make this all overwhelming. I use to think that it was about the dogs so the humans needed to check their baggage at the door of rescue before entering.  Now without the humans there cannot be a rescue.  I have to work with folks that have very different personalities and beliefs than I do.  I hate this part because I have to keep everyone happy so no one takes their toys and goes home before the job is done. The problem does not seem to get better is seems that daily there are more dogs than the day before. My fellow rescue friends are all feeling the drain as I am.

Many of us question our staying power as the vortex of rescue sucks the life from us.  We tell each other to hang in there, to stay strong, take a breath and any other words of encouragement to keep them going; as we know that when one folds that just put more on us that are left. 

I write to keep my sanity but I love to laugh and have fun writing about the chaos I live in.  As of late I am having a very difficult time to find the humors side to life. I am struggling and find that I have to just write even if it is not on the lighter side. I start a blog and then delete as I struggle with this unhappiness that is suffocating me.  I will keep my dark blog in another place and hope that writing can bring me back to a happier place.


Wednesday, July 4, 2012

unhappy ranting

Happy Fourth of July, this is a day I have always loved to celebrate the parades, the picnics in the parks, swimming, and all the outside activities one can imagine then the blanket in the park at dusk watching the fire works.  Wow what more could you ask for to celebrate? No TV, not cooped up with a house full of people just lots of fun and enjoying the friends and the outside. We have been in many  parades with the dogs and taken them to the ball park and watch a Baseball game and watched the fireworks and just enjoyed the day.  Now as I am about one minute from 60 I find that the fourth of July is a pain in the butt.  Today the weather is high 90's and heat index around 100 when I go out side I feel like the extra fat I have gained is literately sizzling off my bones. I just don't remember feeling this hot when I was younger: I lived in Florida for 13 years with no air condition in the car at work or at home.  I start sweating profusely and it drips off the end of my nose and ponytail.  I can't stand the sunscreen and sweat mixing on my skin.  The parades is now a source of anxiety and fear for the dogs and me, we don't go any more.  The parades are not about the independence of our country its about how much noise can each group make between the boom box music the fire engines sirens, the air horns, loud motor cycles, revving engines on modified cars, Aholes in the crowd with fire crackers and lets not for get the cannon truck that shakes the window in the building. I can not take dogs to parades or be in them any more.  We use to get put toward a part of the parade with the other animals away from the loud noises, now there is no place like that in a parade. The fire crackers start in June and last till end of Aug. the noise is to a point that it is getting impossible to keep the dogs calm at night. I have a couple that can not take the noise I use to be able to put them in the basement in a kennel with a TV on to drown out the noise and  keep them as far away  as possible but now it is every night all night.  The whining, howling and pacing at my house is unnerving for me to watch them go through.
We had fireworks in our township last night and they will be in Lansing tonight. I have no desire to go and sit in the dry crunchy grass slapping mosquito's,sweating, listing to 10 different cell phone conversation around me, then hassle with rude annoying people that are packed into these places to watch the festivities   Oh, and now you just can't get in your car and drive away, traffic jam for at least an hour and if your not as pushy and annoying as the rest you will just sit and wait. No thank you.  I am not sure if my age has pushed me past the point of enjoying the holidays or if our society has just lost touch.  Manners and politeness has become a thing of the past loud, rude and annoying has replaced it. My kids would love to go I do not, so walking in this heat has turned them off too. I long for the days when freedom and rights meant responsibility of not pushing ourselves onto others, to care about all because they have the right to not put up with our nonsense.